Porn | Talk To Your Child About Internet Porn

Over the last several years there has been increased concern regarding children's exposure to pornography on the Internet. Studies report that more than 40 percent (and some say as many as 90 percent) of teens and preteens visit pornographic websites on purpose or by accident. Internet porn is big business. It is estimated that 12 percent of all websites are porn sites, generating revenues in the billions of dollars annually. If there are no restrictions in place, a child of any age can easily find Internet porn, often by accident (initially). Not surprisingly, boys are more likely than girls to seek out Internet porn and use increases with age. Some early research indicates that those who frequent porn sites are more likely to objectify women and see sexual behavior as a purely physical act.

How can parents protect their children from exposure to online porn? There are many software options available that block porn sites from your computer. If children are determined to view porn online, however, they likely will find a way to do so. Nowadays, children can access the Internet on a number of devices in addition to the home computer, making the challenge of restricted viewing even more difficult.

For parents, a more sophisticated strategy is to use the power of communication and education. Parents often underestimate their influence over their child's behavior. When parents take an active role of sharing values and engaging their child in a meaningful discussion regarding risk behaviors, such as Internet porn, children tend to internalize their parents' values. It is much more effective to teach your child self-control than to get caught-up in a game of cat and mouse such as secretly checking computer history and putting restrictive blocks in place.

For some children, Internet porn can quickly become addictive, even requiring treatment. In this case, adding restrictions may be necessary. For most children, however, viewing oddities on the Internet is a function of developmental curiosity and experimentation to be expected during adolescence. It is a function of each family's unique set of values to decide when, if ever, to allow this behavior and to what degree. Whatever your view of this behavior may be, it is important to take an active role in educating your child about this and other Internet etiquette.

Having supportive, ongoing, mutually respectful parent-child discussions regarding appropriate Internet behavior may be our most effective parental tool.

Dr. Jan Hittelman, a li censed psychologist, is Director of Boulder Psychological Serv ices and Founder of the Boulder Counseling Cooperative. Ques tions or comments for this monthly column can be sent via email to: jan.hittelman @g mail.com , or by phone: 720-217-3270.